I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
