It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
