It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
