i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
