so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Randomize
