she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
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