If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Randomize
