I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
ttyl tear gas
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
