Porn is love you can see.
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
