Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
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