We're like a lot better than the average bears
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize