Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
You made out with two different species that night
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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