i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
