hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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