Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize