Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
