it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
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