I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
