I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
