Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
