Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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