so explain again why im purple
no
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
