garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i just had sex bonerless
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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