I cockslap morals
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
