haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
