I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
