we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize
