I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize