I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Randomize
