i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
