Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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