Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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