Only a mothe r could love this liver
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
