Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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