come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
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