my room smells like sperm. sweet.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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