You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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