stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I wish you could order shots online.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
