Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
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