we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
