If i come over, it means nothing
I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize