Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
