Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
