If i come over, it means nothing
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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