Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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