Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize