i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Pants are for mortals
Randomize
