Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
whose parrot is this?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Randomize
