idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
