Ambien. No doubt about it.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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