yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
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